The Hold Me Tight NJ weekend of June 13-14th has just concluded. The strength and courage shown by each and every couple to take the leaps of faith necessary to show their vulnerable parts and reach for their partners was remarkable. In our group of 13 couples, each and every partnership made strides. Bearing witness to each metamorphosis touched us deeply. Participants reported that they were able to take these leaps of faith as a result of the safety that they felt with all of our helpers and with Karen and me.
Our weekend experience provides the scaffolding for continuing and expansive couples work both for couples in distress and couples wanting to enhance their connection to their partner. Couples who have been entrenched in a negative dance and desperate for connection with their partner for a considerable time have become unstuck. The unit that we have added about brain physiology, skills to utilize, and emotional regulation was overwhelmingly well received. Couples appreciated leaving the workshop with an understanding of their cycle, a road map for healing and connection and tools to remain within their window of tolerance to maintain connection.
This last weekend, we had two seasoned psychologists who assisted as well as 12 doctoral students who took turns assisting throughout the weekend. Both of our psychologist helpers had assisted before, were moved by the power of the experience, and felt compelled to return. There is always assistance for our couples if they become entrenched, stuck or confused.
A couple of comments from our psychologist assistants are below.
“ I am so “charged” up from this weekend. It really was a “tour de force”. It went without a hitch – smoothly, positively, genuinely, warmly and packed with information that the couples were drinking in. Every couple I talked to – even the ones that came, as one put it “as a last attempt” left with tools, a bit more understanding about themselves and their partners and ways they want to begin improving their relationships. The atmosphere you guys created provided such safety for the risky, hard work that each did.
I think I fell in love with each couple there as I watched them fall more in love with each other. You guys did that!!
It was incredible. Thanks for letting me be part of it. “
“The couples that attended the weekend made shifts that were transformative for them… The addition of the family of origin piece was very helpful… I could go on and on, but just want you to know that your contribution to the field is truly meaningful.”
Our next Hold Me Tight NJ is offered specifically for LGBTQ couples, at MONDO Summit on September 19 and 20, 2015. Our next general Hold Me Tight NJ workshop is on Sept. 26 and 27, 2015, with additional workshops planned for November and March at the Rutgers University and Conference Center. We were sold out for this past workshop, but now have a bigger space so we can accommodate a few extra couples for each session.
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